- Anti Joke

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

A man went skydiving and tragically died.

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

race-car = rac-ecar

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side