A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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