Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops