If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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