How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

knock knock come in !

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down -17

kk

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops