how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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I like that, but why am I happy?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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If you are reading this you are a nerd

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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