What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

Knock, Knock Come in

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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