How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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