What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Roses are red Violets are blue Deez nuts Ha goteem

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

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Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops