What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops