A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

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why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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