What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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