An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops