A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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Yes

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

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What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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