What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Thank you very much for being so kind to me throughout the years. I have never known a better man. Rest in peace.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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http://adf.ly/C8MqG

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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A lot eh?

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops