Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

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What happened to my sunglasses?

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops