Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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