Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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David Cameron

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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