How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

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Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

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sky silverstein

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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