Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops