What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

24

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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