Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

thumb_up thumb_down -22

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops