Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

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What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

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How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops