what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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