Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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