A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

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Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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