Q:What do you do when you see a talking raccoon A:Quit the LSD

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Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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roses are red violets are blue pornhubs down your mums facebook will do.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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A women in the kitchen.

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Whats white and can't climb trees? Yogurt.

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What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

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What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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