Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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knock knock come in

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

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Donald Trump

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops