If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

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Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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Why did the book fly to Cambodia? It was on a plane that was delivering educational material to third world countries to enhance their schools and increase their literacy.

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car and laying on the side of the rode for 2 hours then you find out that your wife was cheating on you with her your own brouther

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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