Why did the black man run out of the shop with items under his jacket? He was shopping for groceries, when his brother texted him, letting him know that his wife had just gone into labour. He then realised that it was a very miserable rainy day outside and he didn't have an umbarella, so he payed for his items, and ran to his car.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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You are so ugly that when u were born, your mom was unable to breast-feed you because she would have to look at your face to do so.

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is this the krusty krab? no this is smooth lobster.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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Please ignore this statement.

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

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What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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What does a blonde say when she being raped? Ow it hurts stop... What does the guys who's raping her say? Oh shut up you know you like it...

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womens rights.

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what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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