What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

Why did the guy die. He OD on drugs

What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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