It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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so today i took a poop. hehe

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops