A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Your big dick.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops