Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

how do you call someone? use a phone

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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