How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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Chlamydia

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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What do you call a kid that hasnt passes 7th grade? A 6th grader

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

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what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops