How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

To mama so old, she might die soon.

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...