Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Why? Why not?

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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