What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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