Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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What's 1+1? 69.

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops