What is my name? I dont know

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

thumb_up thumb_down -33

flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I do u blow up a house U put dynamite in it

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A whole 'nother.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops