Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

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Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

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How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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4 men walk into a bar. They have fun. ~Yasmin~

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Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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What's the difference between a black guy and an asian. They come from different race groups.

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops