Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

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Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

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What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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