quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

Whats pink and slippery? A pink slipper.

What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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