what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

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I have an idea! You leave.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

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The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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