knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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