A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969 i like potatos 696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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