How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Chick Norris... Enough said

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

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Why is my penis rainbow colored?

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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There's a cat, a dog, a rat and a goat... I don't know how the goat got in there?

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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