so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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HEY!

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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Women's Rights

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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