What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

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Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

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Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

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What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops